in conclusion, i ask again:
if a stranger online told you that they had someone who could help a child you knew
and said they could be trusted because they were 'humanitarian of the year'
and they would not tell you who the person or people were
but told you to go to a place where they would 'see you from afar' and 'recognize you'
and that you were to turn over that child to them, what would you do?
if you went to the place they stated, but without the child, and no-one at that place had ever heard of you, what would you think?
this person has now accused me of criminal fraud and hideous evil. i would, for one, at least like to know who her 'contacts' were, why a rational meeting or exchange was ever facilitated, and why no-one was there to meet me.
if anyone wants the (removed) names of the people i spoke to at Niloufer to verify any of my statements, please privately comment at adiasauntys@gmail.com
there is much information here (and i apologise for its being in reverse order) - but before accusing any party of anything, i would request that everyone carefully read and weigh every word of what transpired, and use this as a basis for their decisions.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
[my last letter to trudy. after this, she told a mutual acquaintance that i was part of a cult and refused to speak to me further]
trudy, i am not angry with you. i was....oh was i ever! but i found the ability to let it go. i am sorry if this morning i was short with you - i had just woken up to all of this and was tremendously shocked and hurt.
i understand that you feel differently about the family. our family is Anglican Catholic, and even though i do imagine that Adia's relatives may face repercussions from the Lord, i cannot judge or try to force that. it would only fill me with hatred if i wished it on them, and hatred and anger should never be a part of something that is supposed to bring good in the world. also, studying Hinduism has helped me strive to be more non-judgemental and love the small part in everyone (even ifd it is hidden) that is a part of God. so i stand by all of that. i WOULD like to see them punished for what they HAVE done to Adia, though. i explained to the doctor at Lotus and he said it was not unusual here. he didn't seem too concerned which shocked me, i was hoping he would get ahold of authorities (in the States, i think doctors are obligated to do so).
do you really think it would be helpful to fill out a police report? i never tried it again because, well, to be honest i have no faith at this point in most Indian institutions. i've never really beeen able to get 'authorities' to do much of anything for me. [i was unable to get a police report after a robbery and assault] also, i don't even know if a police report would bring results, or they would just shove it in a drawer somewhere. if you think or have heard that it would be helpful though, i will by all means try it.
now, the important thing: Adia is doing very well!!! we got her labs back today and she tested negative for all diseases. her iron is low, there is something (i'm not quite sure what this means) wrong with her hemoglobin, and she is lactose intolerant. that could explain a lot of why she is so malnourished - the family gave her cow's milk when they gave her anything at all - that would cause diahrrea, which taxes her system further.
i spent most of the day with her and her three relatives (mum, grandmum, and youngest sister) - and i'm no longer so worried about them taking her away again! they were wary last night and i and the doctors had to coax them to let her stay, but it seems they've grown to rather like staying with her in the hospital - air con, teevee, nice plush beds, three meals....they'll probably stay as long as they can to enjoy those things! at least let us hope - maybe for once their greed will work FOR us instead of againt.
Adia's physical progress is astonishing. i cannot believe how well this dear girl responds to the slightest bit of treatment! she was able to sit with her spine erect today (she needs to be steadied, but that is still an immense improvement from before!) and her physical therepist has the nurse doing little 'sit-ups' with her; pulling her arms gently so she can try to raise herself to a sitting position. she does them eagerly and well! her overall aspect was much, much improved - even better than during her prior hospital visit. she is no longer listless - she could even work up a LOUD cry when the doctor gave her an X-ray!! it was the most beautiful cry i've ever heard, right next to the one when my daughter was born. it was a cry of hope.
i am entirely covinced that i have been guided to help Adia because she is meant to do something beautiful and important in the world - the way she has overcome so many things in her small life is nothing short of a miracle.
anyway, despite whatever has happened between us you have helped me somewhat by putting into my mind that i need to be very careful of keeping good records. despite what you believe - my intentions are only good and i don't want anything technical to mess up the work i try to do. when i co-headed the arts NGO, my partner at the time was wealthy - he had an accountant and a lawyer handle everything financial, and too there was much less accountability involved. so i was sort of behacing like i did then as far as records - jotting things downin a notebook and such, stupidly thinking that should suffice. when we become a real NGO, i wil have to keep MUCH better track. so thank you for making that clear to me.
trudy, i won't take up mroe of your time. i was mostly just writing to you because i felt like i had to defend myself because i was hurt. what you said attacked something so close to my heart - and already this has brought my life a great deal of stress. it felt like you were belittling what i have done and saying i was trying to do evil where i am giving everything i have (financially, spiritually, time-wise, etc) to do good. i guess i could not stand the idea that you would think that without trying to tell you what is true. it still does hurt me - but i guess i have to accept that you are entitled to your opinion.
may you and yours be well.
love,
nutmeg
trudy, i am not angry with you. i was....oh was i ever! but i found the ability to let it go. i am sorry if this morning i was short with you - i had just woken up to all of this and was tremendously shocked and hurt.
i understand that you feel differently about the family. our family is Anglican Catholic, and even though i do imagine that Adia's relatives may face repercussions from the Lord, i cannot judge or try to force that. it would only fill me with hatred if i wished it on them, and hatred and anger should never be a part of something that is supposed to bring good in the world. also, studying Hinduism has helped me strive to be more non-judgemental and love the small part in everyone (even ifd it is hidden) that is a part of God. so i stand by all of that. i WOULD like to see them punished for what they HAVE done to Adia, though. i explained to the doctor at Lotus and he said it was not unusual here. he didn't seem too concerned which shocked me, i was hoping he would get ahold of authorities (in the States, i think doctors are obligated to do so).
do you really think it would be helpful to fill out a police report? i never tried it again because, well, to be honest i have no faith at this point in most Indian institutions. i've never really beeen able to get 'authorities' to do much of anything for me. [i was unable to get a police report after a robbery and assault] also, i don't even know if a police report would bring results, or they would just shove it in a drawer somewhere. if you think or have heard that it would be helpful though, i will by all means try it.
now, the important thing: Adia is doing very well!!! we got her labs back today and she tested negative for all diseases. her iron is low, there is something (i'm not quite sure what this means) wrong with her hemoglobin, and she is lactose intolerant. that could explain a lot of why she is so malnourished - the family gave her cow's milk when they gave her anything at all - that would cause diahrrea, which taxes her system further.
i spent most of the day with her and her three relatives (mum, grandmum, and youngest sister) - and i'm no longer so worried about them taking her away again! they were wary last night and i and the doctors had to coax them to let her stay, but it seems they've grown to rather like staying with her in the hospital - air con, teevee, nice plush beds, three meals....they'll probably stay as long as they can to enjoy those things! at least let us hope - maybe for once their greed will work FOR us instead of againt.
Adia's physical progress is astonishing. i cannot believe how well this dear girl responds to the slightest bit of treatment! she was able to sit with her spine erect today (she needs to be steadied, but that is still an immense improvement from before!) and her physical therepist has the nurse doing little 'sit-ups' with her; pulling her arms gently so she can try to raise herself to a sitting position. she does them eagerly and well! her overall aspect was much, much improved - even better than during her prior hospital visit. she is no longer listless - she could even work up a LOUD cry when the doctor gave her an X-ray!! it was the most beautiful cry i've ever heard, right next to the one when my daughter was born. it was a cry of hope.
i am entirely covinced that i have been guided to help Adia because she is meant to do something beautiful and important in the world - the way she has overcome so many things in her small life is nothing short of a miracle.
anyway, despite whatever has happened between us you have helped me somewhat by putting into my mind that i need to be very careful of keeping good records. despite what you believe - my intentions are only good and i don't want anything technical to mess up the work i try to do. when i co-headed the arts NGO, my partner at the time was wealthy - he had an accountant and a lawyer handle everything financial, and too there was much less accountability involved. so i was sort of behacing like i did then as far as records - jotting things downin a notebook and such, stupidly thinking that should suffice. when we become a real NGO, i wil have to keep MUCH better track. so thank you for making that clear to me.
trudy, i won't take up mroe of your time. i was mostly just writing to you because i felt like i had to defend myself because i was hurt. what you said attacked something so close to my heart - and already this has brought my life a great deal of stress. it felt like you were belittling what i have done and saying i was trying to do evil where i am giving everything i have (financially, spiritually, time-wise, etc) to do good. i guess i could not stand the idea that you would think that without trying to tell you what is true. it still does hurt me - but i guess i have to accept that you are entitled to your opinion.
may you and yours be well.
love,
nutmeg
[trudy's last word before she began posting on a separate blog some weeks later]
Nutmeg...I have got to get up in 3 hrs. I know that you are tired. The last I talked to you you were saying that you were going to go to a private hospital. I have tried to explain that to you...I have talked to his wife and he is on his way home and he told his wife that he is not accepting my phone calls. I got him involved in something he didn't even want to be involved in and it cost him an absolute fortune staying behind and changing his flight.
I did attempt to explain everything and after I typed forever (it seems) it was closed. I don't know what to say...I am absolutely stymied. I have not stopped anyone. I have over 60 convos from people who just thought the same. He was my only connection and he has had it with me. No last name..filed under first name? He told his wife after reading threads and posts it was to unbelievable to get involved with it...I can not force him.. He is not taking any more phone calls and told his wife to do the same and he informed her that she is to delete all e mails...
You are right..You can not stop your support system. They have stuck by you and will be there until the end. I am going on a fishing trip tomorrow and will be away from my computer. People love you nutmeg...they will not stop because of this. If they continue with their rants about me it will only cause more attention to this...I am just telling you....
I am sorry about your personal life. Follow avenues that people are telling you to follow. No matter what I say it is not going to give you any satisfaction. If you won't go to the police again and talk to someone in charge and file a police report there is nothing that anyone can do.. I am a Christian and I hope the parents rot in hell. They need to be in jail and they need to be held accountable for this. If they are not then their behavior will just continue...
I just don't know what else you want me to say...I've tried so many times but we are just not communicating..
I have got to be done with this because I can not do anything at this point....now I have to shut my computer off!
Nutmeg...I have got to get up in 3 hrs. I know that you are tired. The last I talked to you you were saying that you were going to go to a private hospital. I have tried to explain that to you...I have talked to his wife and he is on his way home and he told his wife that he is not accepting my phone calls. I got him involved in something he didn't even want to be involved in and it cost him an absolute fortune staying behind and changing his flight.
I did attempt to explain everything and after I typed forever (it seems) it was closed. I don't know what to say...I am absolutely stymied. I have not stopped anyone. I have over 60 convos from people who just thought the same. He was my only connection and he has had it with me. No last name..filed under first name? He told his wife after reading threads and posts it was to unbelievable to get involved with it...I can not force him.. He is not taking any more phone calls and told his wife to do the same and he informed her that she is to delete all e mails...
You are right..You can not stop your support system. They have stuck by you and will be there until the end. I am going on a fishing trip tomorrow and will be away from my computer. People love you nutmeg...they will not stop because of this. If they continue with their rants about me it will only cause more attention to this...I am just telling you....
I am sorry about your personal life. Follow avenues that people are telling you to follow. No matter what I say it is not going to give you any satisfaction. If you won't go to the police again and talk to someone in charge and file a police report there is nothing that anyone can do.. I am a Christian and I hope the parents rot in hell. They need to be in jail and they need to be held accountable for this. If they are not then their behavior will just continue...
I just don't know what else you want me to say...I've tried so many times but we are just not communicating..
I have got to be done with this because I can not do anything at this point....now I have to shut my computer off!
[by nutmeg]
also i dont know if we're just having realy bad communication here but ...
i DID try to meet him. or whoever it was at the hospiatl. over and over again i asked when he wanted to meet and how.
i didnt care if they went to see Adia and fam - i just asked you to tell them not to come and TAKE HER AWAY so i couldnt see her yesterday. because i really wanted to see her.
i dont understand how you can jutify to yourself saying all this stuff about me when i was asking for help - and then just backing out! thats not graceful! really trudy i still would really ebenfit form knowing these resources you said you have! shes in the hospital but I CANNOT AFFORD TO KEEP HER THERE , maybe one more day and thats it! so i NEED to know these people you say you know!
sigh.......
also i dont know if we're just having realy bad communication here but ...
i DID try to meet him. or whoever it was at the hospiatl. over and over again i asked when he wanted to meet and how.
i didnt care if they went to see Adia and fam - i just asked you to tell them not to come and TAKE HER AWAY so i couldnt see her yesterday. because i really wanted to see her.
i dont understand how you can jutify to yourself saying all this stuff about me when i was asking for help - and then just backing out! thats not graceful! really trudy i still would really ebenfit form knowing these resources you said you have! shes in the hospital but I CANNOT AFFORD TO KEEP HER THERE , maybe one more day and thats it! so i NEED to know these people you say you know!
sigh.......
Nutmeg...I am exhausted and so are you...I have to go to bed. Please tell your supporters to quit smearing me. I have said my peace and am bowing out gracefully...
I will not mention this again unless I see my name or any reference to me. I had a gentleman all lined up , he was staying near the University and he asked that I be the go between because of his relationship. with the hospital and his excellent reputation in India..He did not want to give out his number, he just wanted to be a quiet presence.
He's upset with me because he wasted 2 days with this...He wanted to meet Adia and he wanted to meet you. He is just a nice man...His wife told me that he said that he will not get involved with any requests that I make of him again. He is absolutely livid. He is done...and I will be lucky if he ever speaks to me again. You wonder why I'm upset.
I live thousands of miles away...I was being nice to you to give you a heads up..not to scare you...about just getting your ducks in a row in case someone approaches you about the donation end of it (separate from the issue with the hospital) there are agencies out there that are checking very closely about internet fraud...I just wanted you to know that with the blogs, threads, twitter, face book, my space...whatever things like that does not go unnoticed! I was warning you and also telling you that I know that you are on the up and up...This has nothing to do with Adia's health..
This was a totally separate issue. I just wanted to caution you about this...People take this stuff very seriously and you know you have asked for donations.
Nutmeg...I was not being deceptive last night or the day before. I truly wanted to assist in anyway possible, but then when you didn't want to meet him, or let him observe family from a distance...They are letting this girl starve and are bleeding her for alms...I am not processing it.
Please call off your supporters. If they want to convo me they can. It is only hurting your cause...We can all agree to disagree...but the smearing must stop now!
I am done with it...as I said...I've got to get my life back..If you are doing what you are saying you are doing that is great...You have people who obviously love and believe in you...as I said I will not comment again until I see my name under attack.
My involvement is finished. You are hooked up with social services and Adia is in the hospital as you say. When I went on the forum today it was just for answers to questions. Goodnight. Trudy
I will not mention this again unless I see my name or any reference to me. I had a gentleman all lined up , he was staying near the University and he asked that I be the go between because of his relationship. with the hospital and his excellent reputation in India..He did not want to give out his number, he just wanted to be a quiet presence.
He's upset with me because he wasted 2 days with this...He wanted to meet Adia and he wanted to meet you. He is just a nice man...His wife told me that he said that he will not get involved with any requests that I make of him again. He is absolutely livid. He is done...and I will be lucky if he ever speaks to me again. You wonder why I'm upset.
I live thousands of miles away...I was being nice to you to give you a heads up..not to scare you...about just getting your ducks in a row in case someone approaches you about the donation end of it (separate from the issue with the hospital) there are agencies out there that are checking very closely about internet fraud...I just wanted you to know that with the blogs, threads, twitter, face book, my space...whatever things like that does not go unnoticed! I was warning you and also telling you that I know that you are on the up and up...This has nothing to do with Adia's health..
This was a totally separate issue. I just wanted to caution you about this...People take this stuff very seriously and you know you have asked for donations.
Nutmeg...I was not being deceptive last night or the day before. I truly wanted to assist in anyway possible, but then when you didn't want to meet him, or let him observe family from a distance...They are letting this girl starve and are bleeding her for alms...I am not processing it.
Please call off your supporters. If they want to convo me they can. It is only hurting your cause...We can all agree to disagree...but the smearing must stop now!
I am done with it...as I said...I've got to get my life back..If you are doing what you are saying you are doing that is great...You have people who obviously love and believe in you...as I said I will not comment again until I see my name under attack.
My involvement is finished. You are hooked up with social services and Adia is in the hospital as you say. When I went on the forum today it was just for answers to questions. Goodnight. Trudy
[more silence by trudy]
[by nutmeg]
i have to go now and see Adia.
the woman i talked to yesterday was (removed). at Niloufer, i remembered you mentioned Dr.(removed) and after trying to talk to almost everyone else in the building and they didn't know about me, i asked to talk to Dr.(removed). so i went to his office and talked to (removed) about everything. she had not heard of me. i also was asking her for any other options they could help me with and she said other than checking her in they didnt have any options for me!
you can call the hospital and ask abotu this. pelase, DO call and ask about this so you can see its on the up-and-up.
i have to go, remember it's a very different time zone and i wont be back for a while.
[by nutmeg]
i have to go now and see Adia.
the woman i talked to yesterday was (removed). at Niloufer, i remembered you mentioned Dr.(removed) and after trying to talk to almost everyone else in the building and they didn't know about me, i asked to talk to Dr.(removed). so i went to his office and talked to (removed) about everything. she had not heard of me. i also was asking her for any other options they could help me with and she said other than checking her in they didnt have any options for me!
you can call the hospital and ask abotu this. pelase, DO call and ask about this so you can see its on the up-and-up.
i have to go, remember it's a very different time zone and i wont be back for a while.
[by nutmeg]
trudy, i never asked younot to callk me? what did i say that gave you that impression? i am so sorry if i did and that is why all this happened. i said that it would be useless to call me until morning (remember it was the middle of the night here then) because we couldn't get minutes on our phone.
trudy canyou just call me now? i dont know if you will but please i feel it wouild be easier than this back and forth.
also - whati asked exactly was that you ask them not to come and take Adia away yesterday. i couldnt handle that if i never got to see her again! my husband was with me all day, he understands thick indian accents more than i do so he had to keep talking to everyone at Lotus for me.
this time at Lotus they just admitted her under 'jyothi'. honestly i dont know if she HAS a real last name! i found out her mother and father's first names and that's all.
trudy i tried to find these people at Niloufer! for more than an hour and then i had to leave because the grandmother weas getting impatient!
and yes, i still say and i stand by it that i dont want them to get in trouble becaus ei said something that was a rumour, if the rumour was not true. let them get in trouble because of what they HAVE done. otheriwise, its not justice. i am a student of hindu and buddhist philosophy and i have used everything in my soul to try not to hav anger against Adia's family. sometimes i fail, but.....please, undersdtand it the way i see it, these people had horrible lives troo. they were raised in fitlth, poverty, lies, and dishonesty, and are products of that. i hate what MADE them this way, not them. even though yes sometimes i do feel anger toward them too.
listen theres really abd communication here and i know i am scattered but that doesnt make me a faraud! if ytou only could know and understand what i am going threough here and how much i love adia. i broke down crying from joy last night when i was able to pay the bill, i was terrified that we would nto have enough in our savings box - and then the gransdmother didnt want to stay there with adia (an adult has to stay) and finally it all worked - i cannto say how happy i was. it was finally looking good, and now THIS! please trudy. dont do this without having actual reasons! to trell em id dint 'utilize my opportunity' to meet with someone is just cruel! i ewent to niloufer yeasterday even with migivings because i thought it might give me a chance to talk to someone who knew what was going on!
was that actually my only chance? cant you jsut TELL me who these peopel are and give me a contact numeber or something for an appointment? i WANT to talk to somemone who can helkp me help, dont you see that?
[further typo apologies!]
trudy, i never asked younot to callk me? what did i say that gave you that impression? i am so sorry if i did and that is why all this happened. i said that it would be useless to call me until morning (remember it was the middle of the night here then) because we couldn't get minutes on our phone.
trudy canyou just call me now? i dont know if you will but please i feel it wouild be easier than this back and forth.
also - whati asked exactly was that you ask them not to come and take Adia away yesterday. i couldnt handle that if i never got to see her again! my husband was with me all day, he understands thick indian accents more than i do so he had to keep talking to everyone at Lotus for me.
this time at Lotus they just admitted her under 'jyothi'. honestly i dont know if she HAS a real last name! i found out her mother and father's first names and that's all.
trudy i tried to find these people at Niloufer! for more than an hour and then i had to leave because the grandmother weas getting impatient!
and yes, i still say and i stand by it that i dont want them to get in trouble becaus ei said something that was a rumour, if the rumour was not true. let them get in trouble because of what they HAVE done. otheriwise, its not justice. i am a student of hindu and buddhist philosophy and i have used everything in my soul to try not to hav anger against Adia's family. sometimes i fail, but.....please, undersdtand it the way i see it, these people had horrible lives troo. they were raised in fitlth, poverty, lies, and dishonesty, and are products of that. i hate what MADE them this way, not them. even though yes sometimes i do feel anger toward them too.
listen theres really abd communication here and i know i am scattered but that doesnt make me a faraud! if ytou only could know and understand what i am going threough here and how much i love adia. i broke down crying from joy last night when i was able to pay the bill, i was terrified that we would nto have enough in our savings box - and then the gransdmother didnt want to stay there with adia (an adult has to stay) and finally it all worked - i cannto say how happy i was. it was finally looking good, and now THIS! please trudy. dont do this without having actual reasons! to trell em id dint 'utilize my opportunity' to meet with someone is just cruel! i ewent to niloufer yeasterday even with migivings because i thought it might give me a chance to talk to someone who knew what was going on!
was that actually my only chance? cant you jsut TELL me who these peopel are and give me a contact numeber or something for an appointment? i WANT to talk to somemone who can helkp me help, dont you see that?
[further typo apologies!]
[trudy finally speaks]
Nutmeg..I went to post this on the Adia thread and it was closed. It was very long..I asked you to convo me what hospital you were going to and the last time we talked you were going to go to a private hospital. My friend was staying near the University of Hyderbad. He stayed 2 extra days to intervene on Adia's behalf. He contacted his wife and myself for the entire day and we could not tell him where you were going to take Adia.
He was planning on going behind the desk to assess the situation to see if the child was registered under the correct name . You stated that they did not always admit her under her real name. He wanted to make sure that she was looked after. If you needed to talk to him he would make himself available to you. I waited all day to find out where you were taking her. He waited all day and so did his wife.
I told you from the get go that he was doing this for Adia..and was being very discreet at the hospital. He wanted to see for himself. You told me NOT to call you..I got up early to see if you had convoed me. You could have called your husband to convo me. Honestly you told me not to call you...He did not tell the staff...He informed no one.
I informed you that there may be people observing from a far to make sure the family was indeed doing what you were saying that they were doing. They would have been just milling about from a distance. You said that you wanted to spend time with her and then you stated on the forum that you were scared that these people would get in trouble for a rumor. Is that not true? If I knew someone was starving and bleeding their child I don't care if they go straight to hell...why would you protect these vial people..Let the authorities sort it out. Let the chips fall where they may.
I have already brought up so many instances...and you just run around in circles. I am so tired of dealing with this.
Again..I would ask that anyone who has questions convo me...and they have...I have no hidden agenda.
I even gave you a heads up about all the information out there...You know how many scams there are in India..people are going to check it out thoroughly. You had the opportunity to meet with someone with creditials to intervene on Adia's behalf, but did not utilize it.
I don't know what else to say. I will be watching threads and when I see my name I will attempt to give true information. Trudy
Nutmeg..I went to post this on the Adia thread and it was closed. It was very long..I asked you to convo me what hospital you were going to and the last time we talked you were going to go to a private hospital. My friend was staying near the University of Hyderbad. He stayed 2 extra days to intervene on Adia's behalf. He contacted his wife and myself for the entire day and we could not tell him where you were going to take Adia.
He was planning on going behind the desk to assess the situation to see if the child was registered under the correct name . You stated that they did not always admit her under her real name. He wanted to make sure that she was looked after. If you needed to talk to him he would make himself available to you. I waited all day to find out where you were taking her. He waited all day and so did his wife.
I told you from the get go that he was doing this for Adia..and was being very discreet at the hospital. He wanted to see for himself. You told me NOT to call you..I got up early to see if you had convoed me. You could have called your husband to convo me. Honestly you told me not to call you...He did not tell the staff...He informed no one.
I informed you that there may be people observing from a far to make sure the family was indeed doing what you were saying that they were doing. They would have been just milling about from a distance. You said that you wanted to spend time with her and then you stated on the forum that you were scared that these people would get in trouble for a rumor. Is that not true? If I knew someone was starving and bleeding their child I don't care if they go straight to hell...why would you protect these vial people..Let the authorities sort it out. Let the chips fall where they may.
I have already brought up so many instances...and you just run around in circles. I am so tired of dealing with this.
Again..I would ask that anyone who has questions convo me...and they have...I have no hidden agenda.
I even gave you a heads up about all the information out there...You know how many scams there are in India..people are going to check it out thoroughly. You had the opportunity to meet with someone with creditials to intervene on Adia's behalf, but did not utilize it.
I don't know what else to say. I will be watching threads and when I see my name I will attempt to give true information. Trudy
[after trudy's accusation]
Nutmeg...I have too much info to discuss with you..I've been dealing with this for too long...I can not be convinced otherwise...you have told so many convoluted stories I can not keep up. I just can't discuss it. I am talking to others... I am done with it..absolutely done..You have asked for donations $40 from 6 people...I have all the convos, I have all the info. It is out of my hands now. You don't want to get someone in trouble because of rumors...The police would have handled that! They starved their child for alms? Yet no police report nothing...People do speak English...I am not that stupid. I can go right now and garner money for some cause...I have a gift for gab as do you..You put feelings into your words and you have the people who follow your every word to prove it...How much money have you made? Think about it...There are those out there that believe every word that you say...they have their own families to support yet they are willing to give you their little slice of their world....I have not pulled this information out of my ass it is all there in black and white!
I am not a stupid woman. It is out of my hands now...I'm done...nothing you can say will convince me otherwise..I came here to advocate for a child...that was my main reason, but what you've reported isn't adding up to many inconsistencies and total fabrications.
[by nutmeg, apology for typos]
trudy, i have to question your motives.
these 'people' who were supposed to be at Niloufer? they had NEVER heard of me.
i discussed with our board memebers that we could get ongoing carew by subscription...probably around $40 a day from what i'd seen before of standard fees. i paid $200 that i really don't have to spend from my own pocket last night for HER FRIST DAY.
and trudy, i have sat in piles of garbage on the street holding adia while she shat all oiver me dealing with the grandmother's half-crazy babvble while i tried to coax her to go to the hospital. so don't ry to say i'm sitting ehre fromafar putting a kid in the hospital and taking their money.
thsoe are SERIOUS accusations and i do not think you have any place making them. you havent even asked me enough questions to form an opinion yet.
details? try to get details here when you dont speak the ;langhuaghe much and non one takes you seriously. agencies? again, try to get them not to brush you off.
trusdy, if you are really ahu8manitarian you would HELP ME with these things instead of TRYING TO BELITTLE me.
no police report!!!! hpow i wish you could have been there in the police office with me. first we only went to the police when we first saw her. we finally fiund one who spoke a LITTLE english...'oh yes madam we will check into it' 'yes yes we will check into it' i gues they never made it across the block to check into it.
have you every TRIED to get an indin cop to fill out an actual report!
seriously, i am dealing with SO many obstacles here that i really dont need YOU to be one.
tell me ONE 'outrright fabrication;' i swear to my gods thai i have never fabricated a single thing.
and trudy exaclty the amount we have made is there for eveyone to see on my blog (last monmths) the current month is in the gourps account handled by our treasurer.
has all your work made you a cynic or something? to say drdjc is in 'cohoots' with some scam! that sounds CRAZY.
seriously, WHERE were these 'people' at niloufer?
and WHAT convoluted stories?
i want actual details of what you are challenging - that should be MORE than reasonable/
you have all the posts, you have all the info -well of course you do. i put them in a public forum!
have tyou ever stopped for one minute to think of what a TERRIBLE thing you're doign if youre assumptions are WRONG?
look i know you say your mind has been up without giving me a fiar chance bu i cannot accept that! i am DOING NOTHING WRONG and for to accuse accuse accuse and then drop it? that is NOT FAIR trudy!! couldnt you just call me or something and actually try to twork this out and get to the bottom of somehting without acting this way - i cannot understand this!
and if you had all these supicions yesterday why disnt you call me? you could have called me when i was at the hospital. we had our phone!!1
Nutmeg...I have too much info to discuss with you..I've been dealing with this for too long...I can not be convinced otherwise...you have told so many convoluted stories I can not keep up. I just can't discuss it. I am talking to others... I am done with it..absolutely done..You have asked for donations $40 from 6 people...I have all the convos, I have all the info. It is out of my hands now. You don't want to get someone in trouble because of rumors...The police would have handled that! They starved their child for alms? Yet no police report nothing...People do speak English...I am not that stupid. I can go right now and garner money for some cause...I have a gift for gab as do you..You put feelings into your words and you have the people who follow your every word to prove it...How much money have you made? Think about it...There are those out there that believe every word that you say...they have their own families to support yet they are willing to give you their little slice of their world....I have not pulled this information out of my ass it is all there in black and white!
I am not a stupid woman. It is out of my hands now...I'm done...nothing you can say will convince me otherwise..I came here to advocate for a child...that was my main reason, but what you've reported isn't adding up to many inconsistencies and total fabrications.
[by nutmeg, apology for typos]
trudy, i have to question your motives.
these 'people' who were supposed to be at Niloufer? they had NEVER heard of me.
i discussed with our board memebers that we could get ongoing carew by subscription...probably around $40 a day from what i'd seen before of standard fees. i paid $200 that i really don't have to spend from my own pocket last night for HER FRIST DAY.
and trudy, i have sat in piles of garbage on the street holding adia while she shat all oiver me dealing with the grandmother's half-crazy babvble while i tried to coax her to go to the hospital. so don't ry to say i'm sitting ehre fromafar putting a kid in the hospital and taking their money.
thsoe are SERIOUS accusations and i do not think you have any place making them. you havent even asked me enough questions to form an opinion yet.
details? try to get details here when you dont speak the ;langhuaghe much and non one takes you seriously. agencies? again, try to get them not to brush you off.
trusdy, if you are really ahu8manitarian you would HELP ME with these things instead of TRYING TO BELITTLE me.
no police report!!!! hpow i wish you could have been there in the police office with me. first we only went to the police when we first saw her. we finally fiund one who spoke a LITTLE english...'oh yes madam we will check into it' 'yes yes we will check into it' i gues they never made it across the block to check into it.
have you every TRIED to get an indin cop to fill out an actual report!
seriously, i am dealing with SO many obstacles here that i really dont need YOU to be one.
tell me ONE 'outrright fabrication;' i swear to my gods thai i have never fabricated a single thing.
and trudy exaclty the amount we have made is there for eveyone to see on my blog (last monmths) the current month is in the gourps account handled by our treasurer.
has all your work made you a cynic or something? to say drdjc is in 'cohoots' with some scam! that sounds CRAZY.
seriously, WHERE were these 'people' at niloufer?
and WHAT convoluted stories?
i want actual details of what you are challenging - that should be MORE than reasonable/
you have all the posts, you have all the info -well of course you do. i put them in a public forum!
have tyou ever stopped for one minute to think of what a TERRIBLE thing you're doign if youre assumptions are WRONG?
look i know you say your mind has been up without giving me a fiar chance bu i cannot accept that! i am DOING NOTHING WRONG and for to accuse accuse accuse and then drop it? that is NOT FAIR trudy!! couldnt you just call me or something and actually try to twork this out and get to the bottom of somehting without acting this way - i cannot understand this!
and if you had all these supicions yesterday why disnt you call me? you could have called me when i was at the hospital. we had our phone!!1
(at this point i went to Niloufer Hospital and spoke to (name removed - email if curious) as well as most of the rest of the staff. no one had heard of me, trudy, or adia. i returned home to go to sleep - in the morning, trudy had accused me of stealing money in adia's name).
i think maybe a lot of your suspicions are from not knowing firsthand what india is like. the image people have in the West of India is maybe different than what it is - in any case it is VERY hard to get things done here. the infrastructure is lss than functional. to get help from people who are there to help is almost impossible - sometimes things like that even work on bribes (the police and gov't too). also a lot of thins are jsut done very differently. your friend might have had a different experience here because he was 'someone important', but we're just a couple of artists and no-one special here.
i am sorry about your friend being upset with you. i still just cannot figure out how we miscommunicated that so badly. you were wanting me to see him - and I was wanting to see him too! i figured he'd call me if he needed to, or somehting like that would happen - i asked a bunch of times where and how i could meet him and i didn't get an answer - anyway i didnt see it or didnt understand properly. then i got sort of afraid about the organization who you said you didn't know who they were - why are they asking me things when they wont say who they are, etc, am i going to get ambushed by some shady group and end up getting hurt somehow....it sounds paranoid maybe, but it wouldn be the first time something REALLY weird has happened in India! i had a friend who was held hostage BY THE COPS for a bribe. that sort of thing makes me nervous because we are totally alone here - and i have a baby daughter.
you weren't getting clear answers from me, i wasn't getting vclear anwers from you - it all turned into something horrible where it should have turned into something good. i sort of hate using the intrnet for important communciation because of that - it is so easy to miss something or understand it wrongly. and our inability to talk to eachother well made such a mess - i feel so sad about that. but Adia is well so that really lifts my spirits regardless - she's way more important than what i am doing here online!
i'm going to be scrambling for the next 5 days to find an NGO here or anywhere who will get someone to supervise Adia and the family while i am in Nepal. it will be 2 weeks max (because of transit time eand waiting for the visa) but i am not comfortable leaving them for so long. fortunately i will have internet access there too (my laptop is the most useful thing i have for this!) and can keep rallying for attentions for her cause.
another really good thing is that this week there will be a feature about her in an Indian newspaper. i am happy beyond words at that.
okay, i said i wasn't going to take up uch more of your time so i will cut this short and go. trudy, if you ever hear of any NGOs that could help me help Adia in the next couple of weeks, PLEASE tell me thier contact info. i need every resource i can get and i dont want our arguement to stand in the way. i know you are a good woman, we just somehow hit it off badly. if you can help me help even in that small way i would be grateful - i trust your information as you're someone who has been a social worker for a long time. i need someone i can learn from.
love,
nutmeg
i think maybe a lot of your suspicions are from not knowing firsthand what india is like. the image people have in the West of India is maybe different than what it is - in any case it is VERY hard to get things done here. the infrastructure is lss than functional. to get help from people who are there to help is almost impossible - sometimes things like that even work on bribes (the police and gov't too). also a lot of thins are jsut done very differently. your friend might have had a different experience here because he was 'someone important', but we're just a couple of artists and no-one special here.
i am sorry about your friend being upset with you. i still just cannot figure out how we miscommunicated that so badly. you were wanting me to see him - and I was wanting to see him too! i figured he'd call me if he needed to, or somehting like that would happen - i asked a bunch of times where and how i could meet him and i didn't get an answer - anyway i didnt see it or didnt understand properly. then i got sort of afraid about the organization who you said you didn't know who they were - why are they asking me things when they wont say who they are, etc, am i going to get ambushed by some shady group and end up getting hurt somehow....it sounds paranoid maybe, but it wouldn be the first time something REALLY weird has happened in India! i had a friend who was held hostage BY THE COPS for a bribe. that sort of thing makes me nervous because we are totally alone here - and i have a baby daughter.
you weren't getting clear answers from me, i wasn't getting vclear anwers from you - it all turned into something horrible where it should have turned into something good. i sort of hate using the intrnet for important communciation because of that - it is so easy to miss something or understand it wrongly. and our inability to talk to eachother well made such a mess - i feel so sad about that. but Adia is well so that really lifts my spirits regardless - she's way more important than what i am doing here online!
i'm going to be scrambling for the next 5 days to find an NGO here or anywhere who will get someone to supervise Adia and the family while i am in Nepal. it will be 2 weeks max (because of transit time eand waiting for the visa) but i am not comfortable leaving them for so long. fortunately i will have internet access there too (my laptop is the most useful thing i have for this!) and can keep rallying for attentions for her cause.
another really good thing is that this week there will be a feature about her in an Indian newspaper. i am happy beyond words at that.
okay, i said i wasn't going to take up uch more of your time so i will cut this short and go. trudy, if you ever hear of any NGOs that could help me help Adia in the next couple of weeks, PLEASE tell me thier contact info. i need every resource i can get and i dont want our arguement to stand in the way. i know you are a good woman, we just somehow hit it off badly. if you can help me help even in that small way i would be grateful - i trust your information as you're someone who has been a social worker for a long time. i need someone i can learn from.
love,
nutmeg
by trudy
OMG no I'm not offended at all....You are doing what you can...Some "Major Authorities are involved in this and they are just making sure this isn't a scam or an internet fraud that's all...There are many people that have been scamming from India lately they just want to truly know what's going on...and so that is why they are looking through threads etc. to make sure that everything is legtimate. They have probably been reading convos and making sure that things add up. I assured them that you just a humanitarian seeking help for a child in a dire situation. They just want to meet you and Adia and the family (without them knowing of course) and will be very much assessing situation from afar...
They have been looking for her with the pictures you posted, but so far to no avail...Also Indians are prone to gossip as you know so they want to also check about the area for the Yenutaya family..with children's name that you provided...to "Look into" the rumor about the child disappearing and one starved to death...They take these things very seriously, but your name will not be mentioned...
No heaven's no..I'm not offended. I did not realize the extent of these questions..I think they just want to make sure that they are not working with a scammer before they do anything drastic. So many of them are around...It makes it hard on everyone.
Oh the last question I was supposed to ask you is , "Why do you have to go to Nepal for a Visa? Don't even know why they asked that question....
I hope that I cleared that up for you. Once they ask you these questions and get their answers and are positive that this is legtimate and above board then they will proceed forward. I do not know at this point what the outcome would be...I have no idea...I am sure that they will place her in a place where she can at least recover from her starvation and will be kept safe. I am sure once you have satisfied them with honest answers they will arrange for visitation........It's honestly better than her being on the street in those conditions...I don't know what else to tell you.
I can understand you feeling uncomfortable about it, but you are doing nothing dishonest...Do have any other solutions?
Like I said they are going to call around charities and hospitals..and show them pictures of Adia..at this point it looks like they are investigating to make sure that it is all covered and legal....Trudy
OMG no I'm not offended at all....You are doing what you can...Some "Major Authorities are involved in this and they are just making sure this isn't a scam or an internet fraud that's all...There are many people that have been scamming from India lately they just want to truly know what's going on...and so that is why they are looking through threads etc. to make sure that everything is legtimate. They have probably been reading convos and making sure that things add up. I assured them that you just a humanitarian seeking help for a child in a dire situation. They just want to meet you and Adia and the family (without them knowing of course) and will be very much assessing situation from afar...
They have been looking for her with the pictures you posted, but so far to no avail...Also Indians are prone to gossip as you know so they want to also check about the area for the Yenutaya family..with children's name that you provided...to "Look into" the rumor about the child disappearing and one starved to death...They take these things very seriously, but your name will not be mentioned...
No heaven's no..I'm not offended. I did not realize the extent of these questions..I think they just want to make sure that they are not working with a scammer before they do anything drastic. So many of them are around...It makes it hard on everyone.
Oh the last question I was supposed to ask you is , "Why do you have to go to Nepal for a Visa? Don't even know why they asked that question....
I hope that I cleared that up for you. Once they ask you these questions and get their answers and are positive that this is legtimate and above board then they will proceed forward. I do not know at this point what the outcome would be...I have no idea...I am sure that they will place her in a place where she can at least recover from her starvation and will be kept safe. I am sure once you have satisfied them with honest answers they will arrange for visitation........It's honestly better than her being on the street in those conditions...I don't know what else to tell you.
I can understand you feeling uncomfortable about it, but you are doing nothing dishonest...Do have any other solutions?
Like I said they are going to call around charities and hospitals..and show them pictures of Adia..at this point it looks like they are investigating to make sure that it is all covered and legal....Trudy
YIKES! i would have never mentioned going to Nepal for a visa if i thought someone 'official' would be reading my posts. we're going to Nepal for what is known amongst the backpacker's world as a 'visa run'. that's when you leave the country, spend a little time in another one, then get another visa for the original country. it's not illegal but also sort of frowned upon - but we couldn't afford a longer visa last time. if you could explain to them that we're visiting Pokhara and Kathmandu and then coming back in a couple of weeks, i would really appreciate that.
i cannot imagine how they would think this is a scam from reading the whole progress of the story. i know people can be cynical here, though, and with good reason sometimes. it's just very abrupt to have someone step in and take over - and i was never expecting to have to answer these sorts of questions.
in any case, what else do they need to know? and if i am to take Adia back to the hospital today, who should i speak to when i get there to make sure i'm not brushed aside? the last doctor i spoke to there when i was trying to bring her clothing and such was very snarky with me and didn't want to tell me anything, so i don't want to get all geared up for her being able to get treatment again, and then not know who to speak to!
is there anything you know about the organization who is dealing with this? are they gov't or NGO, what is the scope of their work? it's fine if you don't know, just trying to feel out what they will be able to help with and what i should expect from them.
i'll be here for a few more hours - it's morning now - and i'm supposed to meet the family at two.
i don't know if i mentioned fully before, but the place i meet them every day is downtown Hyderabad in a district called 'Abdis' - across from the GPO (general post office) and right next to the bus stop there. i really want to be able to see her today at least, so would you mind asking them not to come take her away or anything before i can see her....i'm supposed to take her to the hospital around 2.
thanks again, trudy. i feel personally a little sad that i might not be able to be as involved with Adia but as long as they're a competent organization and can truly get her the help she needs and hopefully long-term support, that's all that matters.
love,
nutmeg
i cannot imagine how they would think this is a scam from reading the whole progress of the story. i know people can be cynical here, though, and with good reason sometimes. it's just very abrupt to have someone step in and take over - and i was never expecting to have to answer these sorts of questions.
in any case, what else do they need to know? and if i am to take Adia back to the hospital today, who should i speak to when i get there to make sure i'm not brushed aside? the last doctor i spoke to there when i was trying to bring her clothing and such was very snarky with me and didn't want to tell me anything, so i don't want to get all geared up for her being able to get treatment again, and then not know who to speak to!
is there anything you know about the organization who is dealing with this? are they gov't or NGO, what is the scope of their work? it's fine if you don't know, just trying to feel out what they will be able to help with and what i should expect from them.
i'll be here for a few more hours - it's morning now - and i'm supposed to meet the family at two.
i don't know if i mentioned fully before, but the place i meet them every day is downtown Hyderabad in a district called 'Abdis' - across from the GPO (general post office) and right next to the bus stop there. i really want to be able to see her today at least, so would you mind asking them not to come take her away or anything before i can see her....i'm supposed to take her to the hospital around 2.
thanks again, trudy. i feel personally a little sad that i might not be able to be as involved with Adia but as long as they're a competent organization and can truly get her the help she needs and hopefully long-term support, that's all that matters.
love,
nutmeg
by trudy
I do not know the agency...I only know what questions I am supposed to ask..Yes absolutely I will tell them not to go today...they may be lurking about, but you wouldn't notice them. They will notice you though I'm sure! You have a very distinct look..ha
I don't know...I just had no idea it would snowball like this and so fast...It's not that they think you are a scammer ...they are really cracking down on internet fraud and Indian scams..They have so many complaints that apparently they decided that you and Adia were top priority. I don't know what's going on...No one tells me anything..I guess I'm just the go between because I was once nominated as the Humanitarian of the year (see profile) and thought that they could trust me.
I will have to ask about the hospital questions are you going to the private one or back to Niloufer...are you going to pay? Is the family going with you? Are you going to be the Guardian...so many questions...
I did not know that your father was Sonny Vincent...That's cool!
OK...What do you want to do? If you are just going just for travel to Nepal and are afraid to lose contact with Adia why don't you cancel and remain in Hyderabad if you are araid that they will take her and you won't see her again. I would hate to be in your shoes right now...ugh...I'm sure you need a mini vacation.
I do not know what to tell you. I'm wondering also if the family get's wind of this they will go underground....I know that you are exhausted...I'm sorry you are going through this...Trudy I am sorry that you are sad!
I do not know the agency...I only know what questions I am supposed to ask..Yes absolutely I will tell them not to go today...they may be lurking about, but you wouldn't notice them. They will notice you though I'm sure! You have a very distinct look..ha
I don't know...I just had no idea it would snowball like this and so fast...It's not that they think you are a scammer ...they are really cracking down on internet fraud and Indian scams..They have so many complaints that apparently they decided that you and Adia were top priority. I don't know what's going on...No one tells me anything..I guess I'm just the go between because I was once nominated as the Humanitarian of the year (see profile) and thought that they could trust me.
I will have to ask about the hospital questions are you going to the private one or back to Niloufer...are you going to pay? Is the family going with you? Are you going to be the Guardian...so many questions...
I did not know that your father was Sonny Vincent...That's cool!
OK...What do you want to do? If you are just going just for travel to Nepal and are afraid to lose contact with Adia why don't you cancel and remain in Hyderabad if you are araid that they will take her and you won't see her again. I would hate to be in your shoes right now...ugh...I'm sure you need a mini vacation.
I do not know what to tell you. I'm wondering also if the family get's wind of this they will go underground....I know that you are exhausted...I'm sorry you are going through this...Trudy I am sorry that you are sad!
do you know the agency's name? i do want to make sure they have legitimate credentials and all before i give them any really personal information.
i definitely want to talk to them and see who they are and what their intentions are - what the scope is of what they can do to help Adia. if they can provide her real and helpful care, as far as getting her health restored and making sure she isn't starved again, i have no problem with placing the matter in their hands. otherwise, putting her in a private hospital to get well and continue searching for options is a solution too.
i don't know if i'll have a choice necessarily - one thing i've found about India is that it's really, really hard usually to get people involved with something, but when they DO finally get involved, they won't let go of it and sometimes go really overboard. if they go overboard in the mater of getting Adia the care she needs, that's great of course! but if for some reason they can't actually so much for her but still think they should be handling her case, i don't think they'll rest until i'm out of the picture.
you said 'They have so many complaints that apparently they decided that you and Adia were top priority', do you mean they got complaints against my involvement with Adia? if so i'm shocked, i didn't know anyone here was even taking notice of her except for the people in the direct area, even when i was trying to get people to pay attention. how terrible that if people did notice her, they weren't trying to get something done to help her instead of just complaining!
the thing with Nepal is that we've been planning to visit but didn't know if it would be now or in about 3 or 4 months - we're doing a photography book on hand-painted signs of India and surrounding countries and want to get some from Kathmandu & Pokhara. our current Indian visa is up this month, and we heard we possibly could extend it within the coutry, but that turned out fruitless - so we'll take our Nepal trip now, and then come back to India. we can get the visa from the Indian Embassy while we're there. so, all signs point to it being a fairly mandatory vacation!
anyway, i don't mean to sound alarmist or anything about all of this - i've just had some experiences with volunteer and charity work in India before, and some of those ended up turning into a huge mess when Indian organizations tried to get involved with the work international groups were doing. so i guess i'm a little wary from the start! but again, i will be incredibly grateful to them if they can indeed provide the help that i've been trying to get Adia all along. is there anything else they want to know from me right now? and if they wanted to meet me, can they tell me when and how?
oh, also - i really appreciate all you're doing with this! i hope none of it is to stressful for you or too much work. that's aweseom you were Humanitarian of the year, what an honourable position!!! when all of this is calmer, i'll have to get some ideas from you if i aspire to the same title someday ;)
love,
nutmeg
i definitely want to talk to them and see who they are and what their intentions are - what the scope is of what they can do to help Adia. if they can provide her real and helpful care, as far as getting her health restored and making sure she isn't starved again, i have no problem with placing the matter in their hands. otherwise, putting her in a private hospital to get well and continue searching for options is a solution too.
i don't know if i'll have a choice necessarily - one thing i've found about India is that it's really, really hard usually to get people involved with something, but when they DO finally get involved, they won't let go of it and sometimes go really overboard. if they go overboard in the mater of getting Adia the care she needs, that's great of course! but if for some reason they can't actually so much for her but still think they should be handling her case, i don't think they'll rest until i'm out of the picture.
you said 'They have so many complaints that apparently they decided that you and Adia were top priority', do you mean they got complaints against my involvement with Adia? if so i'm shocked, i didn't know anyone here was even taking notice of her except for the people in the direct area, even when i was trying to get people to pay attention. how terrible that if people did notice her, they weren't trying to get something done to help her instead of just complaining!
the thing with Nepal is that we've been planning to visit but didn't know if it would be now or in about 3 or 4 months - we're doing a photography book on hand-painted signs of India and surrounding countries and want to get some from Kathmandu & Pokhara. our current Indian visa is up this month, and we heard we possibly could extend it within the coutry, but that turned out fruitless - so we'll take our Nepal trip now, and then come back to India. we can get the visa from the Indian Embassy while we're there. so, all signs point to it being a fairly mandatory vacation!
anyway, i don't mean to sound alarmist or anything about all of this - i've just had some experiences with volunteer and charity work in India before, and some of those ended up turning into a huge mess when Indian organizations tried to get involved with the work international groups were doing. so i guess i'm a little wary from the start! but again, i will be incredibly grateful to them if they can indeed provide the help that i've been trying to get Adia all along. is there anything else they want to know from me right now? and if they wanted to meet me, can they tell me when and how?
oh, also - i really appreciate all you're doing with this! i hope none of it is to stressful for you or too much work. that's aweseom you were Humanitarian of the year, what an honourable position!!! when all of this is calmer, i'll have to get some ideas from you if i aspire to the same title someday ;)
love,
nutmeg
by trudy
I do not know the agency's name...No I was just saying the complaints about people who scam from India...they are everywhere...One of the largest nations next to Nigeria...It's actually catching up to Nigeria...so they are just super super vigilent!
This is totally your call to make...I do not want to talk you into and out of anything..This is a life decision...You will have to be the person that would have to live with it...We all can give advice...but if you are having uh oh moments you have got to give this some thought...I merely mentioned this scenerio and wow...
So...I do not want to put any more pressure on you...you never know the family may become suspicious and go underground...Good luck with your decision...I will not criticize you for any decision that you make....
I do not know the agency's name...No I was just saying the complaints about people who scam from India...they are everywhere...One of the largest nations next to Nigeria...It's actually catching up to Nigeria...so they are just super super vigilent!
This is totally your call to make...I do not want to talk you into and out of anything..This is a life decision...You will have to be the person that would have to live with it...We all can give advice...but if you are having uh oh moments you have got to give this some thought...I merely mentioned this scenerio and wow...
So...I do not want to put any more pressure on you...you never know the family may become suspicious and go underground...Good luck with your decision...I will not criticize you for any decision that you make....
i do think that if they want to be involved with the family in any way, they shoud proceed VERY carefully. people in this family's position are almost always distrustful especially if they're doing something wrong that they'd prefer to go unnnoticed. if they get wind of an organization sniffing about, they might not only try to eldue them, but also associate them with me and disappear completely. that is one thing i really don't want to happen.
i think it should probably be okay for me to take Adia to Niloufer today, if only perhaps to get the information that was requested about her last visit, if someone from this organization is present i could speak to them then and feel everything out. if something looks amiss i could always take her to a private hospital instead (at leat i assume they wouldn't have anyway to prevent that). hopefully i'm just being a little suspicious because THEY seemed a little suspicious and there's no need for al this worry becasue everything will go perfectly okay!!
thanks again trudy!
love,
nutmeg
i think it should probably be okay for me to take Adia to Niloufer today, if only perhaps to get the information that was requested about her last visit, if someone from this organization is present i could speak to them then and feel everything out. if something looks amiss i could always take her to a private hospital instead (at leat i assume they wouldn't have anyway to prevent that). hopefully i'm just being a little suspicious because THEY seemed a little suspicious and there's no need for al this worry becasue everything will go perfectly okay!!
thanks again trudy!
love,
nutmeg
by trudy:
I will contact the wife and see if she can give me info that you are requesting..I wish I were with you...Just let me know what time you are going and who is going to be with you..If the family is there were you going to be the guardian? Are you going to pay for it...? The reason I am asking are you going to check her in with your name...or the Jyothi Yenutaya name? When you go to the hospital does everyone go or is it different each time? I'm just trying to determine what they are going to be looking for...You and Jyothi ? or Grandma and you and Jyothi? If someone is going to meet with you I'm sure they will want to know this...
Also you do know that every hospital has a social services dept. don't you? Especially one that large...but then again you are leary that she will be taken away...hmmmm..I wish I had a crystal ball...I just don't want you to resent me for getting involved. If you want me to back away I will..Just let me know..I know that you are torn..you have to do what's right for you and Adia...I don't know what else to say...I have just read so much and have had so many questions thrown at me!
ok..I am going to bed...yawn.......let me know what you decide...so I can make some calls if I have to...I will not think less of you no matter what your decision...I will tell you this though..They will want to see records of some kind...since people are donating to the Adia Cause...I hate buracratecy, but working in it for 30yrs. it's unavoidable...Just a Heads up....Trudy
I will contact the wife and see if she can give me info that you are requesting..I wish I were with you...Just let me know what time you are going and who is going to be with you..If the family is there were you going to be the guardian? Are you going to pay for it...? The reason I am asking are you going to check her in with your name...or the Jyothi Yenutaya name? When you go to the hospital does everyone go or is it different each time? I'm just trying to determine what they are going to be looking for...You and Jyothi ? or Grandma and you and Jyothi? If someone is going to meet with you I'm sure they will want to know this...
Also you do know that every hospital has a social services dept. don't you? Especially one that large...but then again you are leary that she will be taken away...hmmmm..I wish I had a crystal ball...I just don't want you to resent me for getting involved. If you want me to back away I will..Just let me know..I know that you are torn..you have to do what's right for you and Adia...I don't know what else to say...I have just read so much and have had so many questions thrown at me!
ok..I am going to bed...yawn.......let me know what you decide...so I can make some calls if I have to...I will not think less of you no matter what your decision...I will tell you this though..They will want to see records of some kind...since people are donating to the Adia Cause...I hate buracratecy, but working in it for 30yrs. it's unavoidable...Just a Heads up....Trudy
oh Trudy, i would never resent you! you've been trying to help, i understand that.
i'd just really like to know who i'm dealing with before i do anything, it's strange to be expected to answer so many things about myself when i don't know who i'm speaking to! - and before i make any decisions about Adia i want to see what sort of credentials they have. i'm curious to what kind of organization they are, if they have legal pull that would make them able to forcibly take Adia or not.
ech, financial records! all i have is the spreadsheet that details expenditures and the paypal archives. i didn't exactly get a receipt from the family every time i gave them a small fortune to let me feed their child! i hope they don't want anything too official....
augh. i never expected something like this to happen, i thought our biggest concern was getting care for Adia.
it's usually the grandmother who goes to the hospital with me. if they'll let me, i'll be happy to be the guardian, and i do intend (as i promised the family) to pay for the expenses.
god, i keep thinking of how people kept talking about buying Adia on the thread, and how i got desperate once and said i just wanted to take her and nurse her back to health myself...i bet that looks just wonderfully to these people! sigh.
i should be meeting the family this afternoon, hopefully they will show up as planned - i expect they will because i promised them money!
love,
nutmeg
i'd just really like to know who i'm dealing with before i do anything, it's strange to be expected to answer so many things about myself when i don't know who i'm speaking to! - and before i make any decisions about Adia i want to see what sort of credentials they have. i'm curious to what kind of organization they are, if they have legal pull that would make them able to forcibly take Adia or not.
ech, financial records! all i have is the spreadsheet that details expenditures and the paypal archives. i didn't exactly get a receipt from the family every time i gave them a small fortune to let me feed their child! i hope they don't want anything too official....
augh. i never expected something like this to happen, i thought our biggest concern was getting care for Adia.
it's usually the grandmother who goes to the hospital with me. if they'll let me, i'll be happy to be the guardian, and i do intend (as i promised the family) to pay for the expenses.
god, i keep thinking of how people kept talking about buying Adia on the thread, and how i got desperate once and said i just wanted to take her and nurse her back to health myself...i bet that looks just wonderfully to these people! sigh.
i should be meeting the family this afternoon, hopefully they will show up as planned - i expect they will because i promised them money!
love,
nutmeg
by nutmegclick
hullo dear Trudy!
first off, i cannot express how grateful i am for your involvement - never did i imagine we would be able to meet someone who could help in this capacity!
i was talking with the family again today and they said that Niloufer refuses to treat Adia any more? i was trying to get them to take her back, and they refused until i suggested a private hospital. i don't know how much of this is true, but i assume there's something i don't know here.
as far as the name, what i have is what our translator (someone we got to help us who was nearby) wrote down for me, from what the brandmother told him. he might have spelled it wrong. the adults in Adia's family are illiterate - they cannot write - but maybe tomorrow i can try again to get their family name and see if they can read whether or not what i write down is correct.
oh, my real name is (removed). we'd be very happy to speak to you over the phone - when you call you'll i think speak to my husband (removed) if that's okay, becasue i am pretty ghastly phobic of talking on phones. he's been doing all of my Adia calling and receiving so far, and he knows everything that is going on too - if there's something specific that only i know, i'll be right here in the room as well.
our number is (removed) - you will likely have to dial the country-code 91 first.
love,
nutmeg
hullo dear Trudy!
first off, i cannot express how grateful i am for your involvement - never did i imagine we would be able to meet someone who could help in this capacity!
i was talking with the family again today and they said that Niloufer refuses to treat Adia any more? i was trying to get them to take her back, and they refused until i suggested a private hospital. i don't know how much of this is true, but i assume there's something i don't know here.
as far as the name, what i have is what our translator (someone we got to help us who was nearby) wrote down for me, from what the brandmother told him. he might have spelled it wrong. the adults in Adia's family are illiterate - they cannot write - but maybe tomorrow i can try again to get their family name and see if they can read whether or not what i write down is correct.
oh, my real name is (removed). we'd be very happy to speak to you over the phone - when you call you'll i think speak to my husband (removed) if that's okay, becasue i am pretty ghastly phobic of talking on phones. he's been doing all of my Adia calling and receiving so far, and he knows everything that is going on too - if there's something specific that only i know, i'll be right here in the room as well.
our number is (removed) - you will likely have to dial the country-code 91 first.
love,
nutmeg
if a stranger online told you that they had someone who could help a child you knew
and said they could be trusted because they were 'humanitarian of the year'
and they would not tell you who the person or people were
but told you to go to a place where they would 'see you from afar' and 'recognize you'
and that you were to turn over that child to them, what would you do?
if you went to the place they stated, but without the child, and no-one at that place had ever heard of you, what would you think?
these are the conversations which passed between myself (nutmeg) and a woman named trudy.
and said they could be trusted because they were 'humanitarian of the year'
and they would not tell you who the person or people were
but told you to go to a place where they would 'see you from afar' and 'recognize you'
and that you were to turn over that child to them, what would you do?
if you went to the place they stated, but without the child, and no-one at that place had ever heard of you, what would you think?
these are the conversations which passed between myself (nutmeg) and a woman named trudy.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)